Episode 1

Gemini Croquette introduced the competitors to their luxurious New York City apartment and laid out the rules: at the end of every episode, one of them would be eliminated. Even before she announced the week's task, though, one brazen competitor mispronounced her name as "Jiminy Cricket", and he was the first to hear those fateful words: "You're fired!"

Episode 2

The remaining would-be Apprentices competed to design Ruby Rhod's next wardrobe. Mr. Rhod was quite pleased with the "super-green" creations, but when an ugly naked guy modeled in only thermal bandages, Ruby dismissed him with just a contemptuous hand-wave and a "Bzzzz!"

Episode 3

The one with the taxis — candidates joined the business; but one was DQ'ed when a klutzy plummeting Nucleolab scientist landed in his vehicle. "Dismissed!"

Episode 4

The zealous opponents competed to sell as many Golden Menus as they could. A cab chase called jumbo NYPD cops away, so one team couldn't make the quota. Vexed, G. C. told a scapegoat that he was "so gone!"

Episode 5

Task: unclamp a tomb-bound Mondoshawan who was caught as a slab shut. A lax palooka took on that job and lost to vast, squat, muscly yokozunas. "You– out. Now."

Episode 6

As usual, a schmaltzy show about past tasks. G. C. had to quash a vocal doxy: "Just go!"

Episode 7

A malacology task; most sought quahogs w/ chutzpah, but a vacuous lummox just caught small clams... "You. Go."

Episode 8

A wacky potluck: axolotl gumbo, kumquat gazpacho... a jackal uvula?

(Midway through this episode, the writers quit, citing cruel and unusual working conditions, and the show was cancelled with 19 candidates still remaining.)